when the status quo frustrates.

Firedoglake eats shit, fucks the dead, and misses the point entirely

Thursday, November 30th, 2006

Firedoglake, home of unapologetic purveyors of blackface, friend to mysogynist self-righteousness, continues to mis-step.

Pachacutec @ FDL likes to soak in sexist asshattery. Zuzu made a clear and simple case for why it’s not okay to paint Congresswomen as knob-slobbering whores:

And, seriously, how can you sit there and be shocked, shocked, that people you don’t agree with are attacking Nancy Pelosi for her femaleness and not realize that you’re contributing to the problem by portraying a United States Congresswoman as a cumguzzling two-dollar whore? By whining that women are too sensitive because they complain when you call a media figure a cunt?

Similarly, TRex @ FDL thinks “cunt” is a cool insult. As linked here previously, Piny dismantled TRex’s claim that the use of “cunt” was a reclamation project:

Like I said: in order to even pretend to reclaim a word, you have to use it differently. You cannot use it as it has traditionally been used. If you do, you are not attacking but supporting the hateful ideas implicit in the original. I know it sounds straightforward, but a lot of people get confused.

In both cases, FDL’s offenses are obvious. The Feministe critiques are straightforward. There’s really no wiggle room on this one. So what’s the official FDL response?

Would you believe a celebration of FDL’s gutsiness by the blackface promoter herself, Jane Hamsher?

(more…)

Two steps forward, one shove back

Thursday, November 30th, 2006

GM’s taking steps (albeit baby ones since we know they’ve already developed and quashed a successful electric car) to be more competitive in the environmentally sound market:

General Motors Corp. will introduce new hybrid gasoline-electric autos next year to take sales from Toyota Motor Corp., the leader in the fuel-saving technology.

GM plans three hybrid-electric versions of its Saturn Vue sport-utility vehicle, including one that plugs into an outlet, as part of a new focus on “electrically driven” autos, GM Chief Executive Officer Rick Wagoner said in a speech today. Plug-in hybrids recharge when the vehicle isn’t in use and switch to gasoline when the batteries are drained.

But they don’t have to like it:

Nov. 29, 2006 — The chairman and CEO of General Motors today gave a shove to a protester at the Los Angeles Auto Show who asked for a pledge to make GM the leader in fuel economy by 2010.

10,000 US scientists/experts call for EPA to step up on global warming

Thursday, November 30th, 2006

Raw Story has printed a letter sent to Congress from thousands of US scientists and experts.

In it, our scientific community expresses unconditional recognition of the real dangers of global warming, the impact it’s already had on our planet, and the urgent need for government action to reduce our fossil fuel consumption. Though the EPA has left our planet for dead, at least a huge number of American scientists are trying to do something about it.

My one complaint about the letter is that it occasionally uses the term “climate change,” which is a Republican frame that attempts to make global warming seem more like a pleasant seasonal alteration and less like a potential devastator of modern society.

But that’s a minor issue, and probably one that feeds into their plan. As we all know, whenever the right wants to distract us from their failings, they manufacture absurd definitional arguments. In Iraq, we’re debating over whether the violence constitutes “civil war.” By refusing to acknowledge that it does, Republicans have moved the debate away from the war and the bloodshed (plus the fact that it’s all their fault) and into the realm of semantics. The same thing is true for reproductive freedom. We spend loads of time arguing over whether a zygote is a person or not, but it really doesn’t matter.

Whatever they choose to call it, any time a conservative pulls the “we can’t be sure” card when it comes to global warming, or whenever one chooses to play semantic games about the environment and what warming “really means for the planet,” we should simply refer them to something like this letter. The unanimity from environmental experts is further proof that the debate is over.

PS3: For the good of humanity?

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006

Gaming with a heart of gold:

People who buy Sony’s new PlayStation 3 console, which hit U.S. stores last week, could help search for a cure to diseases like cancer and Alzheimer’s by connecting their machines to the Internet.

The new PS3 machines are as powerful as supercomputers and can help Stanford University researchers speed up analysis of complex human protein structures, according to Nanako Kato of Sony’s gaming arm, Sony Computer Entertainment.

When the program — dubbed Cure@PLAYSTATION 3 — is launched, PS3 owners can contribute by registering their machines with Stanford, downloading specially designed software and leaving their machines online to process data when they’re not playing.

Kill people when you’re playing, save them when you’re not.

It’s like ‘Wedding Crashers’ crossed with ‘Not Without My Daughter!’

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006

Have you ever crashed a party with some friends, scamming all the good drinks and roughing up the house like you belong? And as you’re making some new friends, did you ever look around and notice your friends had bailed? And that maybe the people you’d been making nice with aren’t so reliable? And a third of the party had already been bludgeoned to death in the living room, many by your friends who skipped out?

Probably not.

But if you had, would you really want to spend a few more hours hanging out where you aren’t wanted, don’t belong, and shouldn’t have gone? As the party descends into a riot — one started by your friends’ killing spree — there probably wouldn’t be a whole lot you could do to stop it, is there?

Could someone please tell that to Robert Gates? That’d be great, thanks.

Judge spots Constitution in toilet, tells Bush not to flush

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006

What ho, is that a check and/or balance I see over yonder?

A federal judge in Los Angeles has ruled that the Bush administration violated the Constitution when it froze the assets of more than two dozen alleged terrorist groups after the Sept. 11 attacks.

U.S. District Judge Audrey B. Collins, in a ruling released Monday, held that an executive order Bush issued Sept. 24, 2001 — designating 27 groups and individuals as “specially designated global terrorists” — was “unconstitutionally vague.”

The citizens of Wingnutteria are probably adding an extra stockpile of Ramen to their bomb shelter shelves now that the main Kurdish political party in Turkey and a rebel group fighting for a separate homeland for Tamils in Sri Lanka have had their assets unfrozen. It’s only a matter of time until a Turkish-Kurdish/Sri-Lankan-Tamil alliance joins with Darth-Vader-esque Osama bin Laden and French overlord Jerry Lewis to pour through our unguarded borders and rob us of the few remaining rights and privileges not already stolen by our current administration.

Hopefully, we may get a few of those rights back:

Earlier in the case, Collins struck down portions of a law that made it a felony to provide “material support” to terrorists, saying that language in the Patriot Act, which had amended the law, was ill-defined. The Justice Department has often used the material support law in prosecuting terrorist cases.

Will it stand? Who knows. But for one day, at least, we can celebrate a defense of the processes and individual protections promised us.

“Reclamation project” gone awry

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006

Piny explains why ignorant, petulant firedoglake writers can’t just fling the “c” word around and try to pretend it’s cool. Fantastic stuff.

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

Tuesday, November 28th, 2006

Chuck Norris is the gift that keeps on giving this holiday season. And here I figured he’d never achieve the dizzying heights of cluelessness that his debut achieved. But here he is, ready to unleash some of that patented kung-fu cowboy action in the War on Christmas, which as you’ll recall has already been won.

Since like his doll name counterpart, we’ll never be completely rid of Chucky, we might as well make the best of it. I know, I know, but complaining won’t change anything. To make it easier on all of us, I hypothosize that Chuck’s columns make for an excellent text-based drinking game. You have until the end of the thread to help me flesh out the rules.

1. Take a shot every time Chuck mentions that he used to be a professional martial artist.

We had so little money that I didn’t have real toys to play with, so I used clothespins and an active imagination.

The clothespins served as toy soldiers or cowboys. I made the big clothespins the bad guys and the little ones the good guys. Of course the larger they were, the harder they fell! (Imagery that would later serve my Martial Arts career.)

Make it two shots if the term “martial arts” is used in conjunction with the term “six time world champion.”

2. Take a shot every time Chuck mentions that he used to be an actor.

3. Take a shot for every mention of humble beginings.

I can still remember her coming home exhausted from her job at the laundry and saying that we were blessed. We didn’t have much, but what we did have, we sure appreciated. And what we had most was each other, and the Lord.

Take three shots if tear-inducing references to childhood hardship and the simple pleasures of life is followed immediately by commercial plug:

Most of all, I still believe what mom taught me: the heart of Christmas is found in a stable not in a store.

No business can take away that fact from any of us.

(One of the best ways you and your family can be refreshed about the true meaning of Christmas this season is by seeing the new family-friendly movie, ”The Nativity Story,” opening in 3,000 theaters nationwide this Friday, Dec. 1. I recommend it highly!)

Four shots if he ever plugs anything that he is in.

4. One shot for every cliche:

Some might call me old-fashioned, but I still believe in a white Christmas, chestnuts roasting on an open fire, and family and friends giving thanks to God.

See if you can come up with any more. But I think that my rules alone can make a single Chuck Norris WND column an alcohol poisoning related trip to the emergency room. So in the interest of keeping the fatalities to a minimum:

5. Shots must be consumed while your friend who can make the funny voices recites the offending lines while dangling this picture in front of his face:

chuck_norris_1.jpg
Friends, we all must model and teach children that the heart of Christmas isn’t found under a tree. It’s discovered in our hearts. Now who wants to oil my chest?

Any booze that is splashed out of the cup during the giggling fit is gone forever and needs not be replenished before the shot is consumed.

Post title from ChuckNorrisFacts.com

Who does a blog have to blow to get a little recognition around here?

Tuesday, November 28th, 2006

Via Sadly, No!, Americans for Truth have set up a convenient list of pro-homosexual organizations, just in case you was wondering where the gays were at so you could, uhhh…hate them, yes, that’s it. So you’d be aware of where they were as you thought about how much you hate that sin, that throbbing, sweaty, panting, sexy sii….

OK, take a deep breath, and focus on the homos.

I was a bit disappointed by their blog list, though. It’s so short!

Pro-Homosexuality Blogs

* Andrew Sullivan
* Evil Gay Lawyer
* Ex-Gay Watch
* Faggoty-Ass Faggot
* Good As You
* Joe Brummer
* News Fit to Post
* Pam’s House Blend
* Queer Today
* Queerty
* Quench Zine
* Sadly No
* Skinny Little Faggot
* The Angry Fag

That is one short list though. It’s missing at least one entry that I know of…us!

That’s right, PunkAssBlog is pro-homosexual, whatever that means! Now we’re not much of a resource, but then again, I don’t see Sadly, No photoshopping exclusivly for the gays either. And even though we’re only a B-list blog:
B-List Blogger
I think we can make up for it by being extra-pro-gay.

And sexier. I note that some of those so-called “gay resources” do not infact devote any webspace to tantalizing descriptions of gay sex or video from various homosexual orgy parades. Whereas we, on the other hand, have at least one post devoted to Marc’s hot, naked chest complete with an attempt to lure a Christian blogger into the lifestyle via a sneaky chest-off. How’s that for gay, huh? Pretty gay, I think.

Give me a G! Give me an A! Give me a G-A-Y! Yaaaaayyyyyy Gaaaaayyyyyy! Look, I’ve even got pom-poms:


EB023486.gif pompom.PNG

Can we be on the list now?

Consider helping Americans for Truth out. If you are aware of any gay resources, go ahead and send them a message.

Kids say the darnedest things

Tuesday, November 28th, 2006

FOX News sounds the whorebell

Tuesday, November 28th, 2006

What with Iraq collapsing and the Republicans suicide-bombing their future, FOX News has turned to covering what really counts: the Britney Spears party watch.

Both the TV network and its website are ogling the newly single Ms. Spears’ forays into hardcore clubbing with America’s favorite professional lush, Paris Hilton:

Spears and Hilton were snapped on their third night out in a row in Los Angeles, drinking and dancing with a bunch of sex-crazed guys — and then swapping one sexy stocking with each other.

You wouldn’t think moral, flag-humping chickenhawks like the fine folks from FOX would stoop to discussing such drivel, but now that the country’s fallen into the hands of sex-crazed hedonists like Nancy “Paris has me on speed-dial, too!” Pelosi and her liberal hooligans, even our finest role models can’t help but go woozy from that pleasure roofie the voters surreptitiously placed in our national drink.

Just look at the sexy sentence quoted above. Even FOX couldn’t help but mention ‘sex’ in it twice, which is tres sexique, and it effortlessly conjures the alluring mental image of Britney grinding that pert bottom against countless lusty crotches. The pournalism fantasy wouldn’t be complete without lesbian overtones, though. Fortunately, the stocking swap detail places that cherry on top.

And with it, all systems are go. Conservatives may now commence masturbation, followed by the climax, the traditional post-coital heaping of shame and self-hate upon oneself, and, finally, the lashing out at others who dare enjoy the simple pleasures but somehow manage to skip that shame/self-hate step.

Like Britney.

I also find it interesting FOX always asks women to cover their trashiest subject matter. If you think about it, though, these assignments align quite well with the network’s goals. One, it keeps the ladies from having to talk substantively about complicated man-subjects like war and Terry Schiavo. Two, it helps News Corp dodge accusations like “my, aren’t you a gaggle of sexist assholes?” Three, it saves all those dudes with hard-ons from having to think with their heads after viewing this snapshot:

Just think what it’s like for the FOX newshounds who’re forced to stare down that picture: God, that makes me want to ejaculate. How dare she act like she can just flaunt those tits! Isn’t she a mom? Shouldn’t she be at home with babies hanging off those things? I know what I’d do with ‘em. Dammit, no woman should be allowed to dress like that unless she’s gonna put out. And Britney wouldn’t fuck me. God, that sucks. That bitch has some nerve showing me titties I can’t have. And those legs. Mmm. And grinding against those douchebags in some club. Who the hell does she think she is? Maybe if I just rub my tip a little it’ll go away. Damn, she looks sexy. And happy. Fucking bitch.

Here’s hoping that the women working for FOX — like the author of this piece, Heather Gilmore — write their softcore erotica just to mess with them.

Inconvenient, indeed

Monday, November 27th, 2006

The National Science Teachers Association would love to tell you why they’re more than willing to show a video called “Fuel-less: You Can’t Be Cool Without Fuel” to millions of kids while quickly rejecting a donation of 50,000 copies of An Inconvenient Truth, but it’s hard to talk when you’ve got a mouthful of greasy, sweaty oil-company ballsack.

[h/t Raw Story]